Lyrics...its what I do

I'm going to be brutally honest - I've been drinking all day. And I used to do that a lot (not a healthy thing, I know), but nowadays it is a rare(r) occurrence. But it happened today, and I don't regret it. I had no obligations, it is Interim, and I had both the best and the worst time last night. Both the best and the worst deserve drinking.

So anyway, all day I've been in a total funk for various reasons. And when I say "total funk", I mean "I just want to punch a hole in the wall and scream my heart out" kind of mood. And all day, I've just been mulling over my past decisions from last night (from years long gone by?) and mulling over what it means to finally get what you want/be happy.
And all day I've been depressed/angry/sad/raging because at the end of the day....fuck it, I know what makes me happy, but I think (know?) that I settle for the temporary fix that makes me feel good for a short period of time, instead of tryingworkingcaring enough to actually do what is best.

{I got distracted for a half hour and lost this train of thought, but here are some lyrics that are from a song I was listening to when I was writing this}


I'm washing it down. Watch me fall.
It's the shock of the sound of the ants.
to carry me off towards home.

I'm better now, not behind the eyes.
-A Wilhelm Scream "In Vino Veritas"
(That's how I am feeling right now...specifically, the last line)

I got a sad, sad thirst.
We're all whores.
I had a happy thirst, but then came you.
-A Wilhelm Scream "When I Was Alive (Walden III)"
(That's often how I feel when I drink)

The fucking looks those people gave us.
No fucking bullets can erase this.
AWS - "Killing It"
(more for a good friend of mine than for me. The people around you {even if you don't know them} leave an impression)

Too tired (drunk?) to write any more/copy more lyrics, but I will say these parting words....
...Lostprophets

"Always, all ways" - makes me cry all time
"Last Train Home" - makes me think of my current situation (my own doing, this situation?)

I could go on with every song that is bring up emotionssituationsfeelingsemotions for me, but I won't. Just know....Frienships are the most important thing in life. Never let them go.